How to edit financial writing [part 3]
We’re not sure what “successful and instrumental paradigms that result in industry-leading financial products” means to you, but we are sure a few of your customer’s eyes rolled back in their heads when they tried to read it.
Wordiness and technical jargon (we’ll share the exceptions below) have little place in fintech and financial marketing.
They only confirm you don’t know how to say what you want to say, or are unclear about your target audience.
So if you struggle with ornamental verbiage, fluffy phrasing, or technical jargon in your communications, this editing guide will help you bounce out the bloat and buzzwords.
Shake it off, shake it off
Regular people like to read regular words that get to the point quickly.
Not only do they like them, they read more of them when they are simple.
So let’s start with three editing steps that will help you shake off complicated financial writing.
STEP 1: K-I-S-S
This acronym reminds us to “Keep It Simple… Swiftie.”
Will this convey that your business, product, or service is also simple? Au contraire!
Don’t assume that clear, straightforward messaging will dumb down a product or service. It’s the other way around. Simple messaging is more direct and more powerful than all that clutter, especially in the context of fintech and financial products or concepts.
Let’s see how this might look in practice.
> Complex: Our platform provides a comprehensive suite of financial tools that facilitate seamless integration and operational efficiency.
> Simple: Our platform offers easy-to-use financial tools that save you time.
> Complex: Utilizing our state-of-the-art algorithm, we ensure optimal investment strategies for our clients.
> Simple: Our advanced algorithm helps clients invest wisely.
STEP 2: 100 to 30 in 60 seconds
We believe that 100 words can almost always be pared down to 30. Next time you edit some writing, see if you can chop 70% of your word count and still convey the same idea.
Example:
100 words
There are some people who believe that ABC’s platform is instrumental to the success of their investments. Some pundits and others have told us that they use it because of how simple and easy it is to apply. It is clear that the industry has a problem. It is obvious that other companies charge too much in fees without giving the right kind of advice. Given the fact that we have tested our models beginning in the year of 2015, our successful state-of-the-art ABC algorithm offers a holistic view of life expectancy, retirement goals, personal savings, and retirement location data to tell people how to invest properly.
30 words
Since 2015, ABC has helped investors meet their financial goals. We consider an investor’s life expectancy, savings, retirement goals, and location data to offer personalized, low-cost advice that’s easy to understand.
Some tips for reducing word count:
1. Eliminate redundancies: Remove words or phrases that repeat the same idea.
2. Use active voice: Active voice is more concise and direct.
3. Combine sentences: Merge short, choppy sentences into one coherent statement.
4. Sure, try AI: But you will need to follow up with a human edit. AI is prone to exaggeration if not outright hallucination.
This editing exercise will not only give you more word count to say something of substance, it will also leave space to add visuals like graphs or explanatory charts without cramming.
STEP 3: Read it out loud
We can’t repeat this enough. The simplest way to cut down on wordiness is to read writing out loud to yourself as an official editing stage.
Trust us. It works.
If there’s too much information to absorb, consumers will lose interest. When a sentence or words become more than a mouthful or take a couple of breaths to finish, you know what to do. Cut. It. Out.
Here’s how:
> Go step-by-step: Read each sentence aloud and listen for parts that sound awkward or overly complex.
> Simplify: Rephrase or cut out sections that don’t flow naturally or add value.
> Get feedback: Have someone else read your content aloud to catch anything you might have missed.
Exceptions to the jargon rule
If you are a B2B business and your target audience is the C-Suite, or engineers, or technical professionals, jargon may be used sparingly when it supports your sales argument.
In highly specialized financial or business environments, sometimes technical language is the only way.
But remember that in any room of executives, grasp of jargon will vary. So a more straightforward writing approach ensures you communicate with everyone equally. Human beings have human feelings and desires, even if they speak like robots in the Zoom meeting.
So if you must use jargon, just remember to:
1. Know your audience: Use jargon only if it’s appropriate for the reader’s level of expertise.
2. Define all terms: When using technical language, briefly explain any complex terms.
3. Balance clarity with precision: Ensure your message is clear as well as accessible to multiple levels of comprehension.
A clearer ROI
Wordiness and jargon can dilute your message and alienate an audience. Who cares if you sound smart if you can’t get people to buy your solution?
By keeping your language simple, concise, and clear, you can communicate more effectively, keep your readers engaged, and boost ROI on every piece of writing.
